hpsauce

I liked the long sentences with many commas and colons as it gave the impression of following the character/you think. The ending I feel is very strong as it wraps ...

Thanks for your comments, they are much appreciated. As for the grammatical/spelling errors I can only say that the whole thing was written in a bit of a hurry although ...

Prologue The pleasant sub-urban area of Fordingbridge was generally a well respected part of Southampton. Its leafy, graffiti-free streets had long been the backyard of many a middle class business ...