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Re: One Country, Two Worlds [Part 1]
Over all, I think it's a great piece. Wonderfully written. I have a few edits that may or may not be personal preference. I think the poem was great, but ...
Jan 18, 2011 -
Re: Death's Visit
Hilarious. But I dislike that Death uses the word "Joshing" (though it may be spelled differently). It seems a bit unnatural and too humorous for death. This was funny in ...
Apr 15, 2009 -
Re: The Triangle Effect
To be honest, it was a bit too much dialogue for me. I'm not saying that you need to get the two characters talking less but some when you look ...
Apr 15, 2009 -
Re: Doll
Now, I feel stupid for sting this but I'm utterly confused. I get that the girl is a doll but who eats a doll? So all I have established is ...
Aug 16, 2008 -
Re: The Elements
I think the plot is good. I do agree it is overused, though. Like I used to write a story exatly *stresses the word 'exatly'* like that. I'm not saying ...
Aug 15, 2008
