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Re: Unnatural
The rhythm and syllable symmetry was really out of proportion for a while. Better word choice could really help out, but this topic really has potential and a pretty good ...
May 13, 2009 -
Re: Down in the Valley
Better word choice (to get rid of the filler words) could really enhance this poem. This poem made me think of The Outsiders (you know, silence is golden, stay golden ...
May 12, 2009 -
Re: everything's okay
I believe that this poem could have been a lot stronger, and I also believe that better word choice would improve it greatly. Refrain from using the word 'cause' instead ...
May 12, 2009 -
Re: Welcome New Members! [2]
Hello fellow writers! I found this site on google, and I must say that I am happy to be here! I can't wait to get some of my writing post ...
May 12, 2009
