davidechoe13

It's a good story but it needs to be longer it could be made into a very suspenseful mystery novel. the shortness of it doesn't do the story justice.

I thought it sounded really interesting. One of the few that i have tried to read and review and actually finished. Great job!!

real good i thought it was decent, overall good. few spelling errors and stuff but that was really all i saw wrong with it i thought the story was good ...

cool

David Echoe walked down the hall his dark blue backpack hanging off one arm he took off his red hat and ran a hand through his thick brown hair. I ...

will this work is it better or what? i added to the plot thing

well this is my first time doing this i dont really know how that works do i just type it in with the plot thing and thanks for the suggestion ...

Name: John Mudd Age: 17 Skills: Climbing,thieving,spying,exploring Description: Red hair good with any weapon doesn't like heights. Not good with spiders to much. Likes medieval weapons. sort of crazy

very good for a first chapter maybe slow down a little. Describe whats going on. describe what the character looks like. all in all i thought it was pretty good.

This is a land of darkness. The evil lizard army has started the ancient mechanisms deep within Atlantis causing it to rise from it's watery grave. The Lizards are slowly ...