dannyr122

Little white men are invading, They are graceful and frozen in flight, Little white men are invading, They are painting the whole world white. They are attacking the trees and ...

I have to agree with Blink Lonely bones of old maids rumble into empty graves The first two lines make it seem like it will rhyme and when it doesn't ...

What the hell are you going on about? What is this ultraphone that you speak of. You don't explain that and you simply tell us some things it does. I ...

Nice poem but there are two things i would like to point out. good and bad This sentence doesn't fit with the description and in my eyes doesn't make sense. ...

1 The canisters were finally ready. The technology was finally here. The war was finally looking up. America would stand proud. They had done it. The canisters contained a biological ...

By a break up or a unshared love It should be an unshared love (hate to be picky but i can find so little wrong with this poem) Others think ...

Apart from the million mistakes with grammer and spelling, the story isn't half bad. However, as i am picky i want to bring up a few points. After a very ...

a ruthless penguin dictator known only as El Penguino had taken england hostage after a fight with marty the walrus. (the fight was later to be ended by a rather ...

Like the other i have little to say about this poem. It is a poem which doesn't call out to me at all but i definately don't hate it. It ...

To be honest this piece was not good in my opinion and didn't really do anything for me. I disliked the mistakes and odd sentences and these detracted from the ...

I think this is a clever idea. The thing that i find detracts from the overall piece is the rhyming problem you have. You go in and out of rhyming ...

I wrote this as an English GCSE creative writing story. What do you think of it? The bank was being robbed. Thousands of pounds were being thrown into bags and ...

The story is now finished but will be edited with your help. I have briefly commented at the end of the story on what i was trying to convey within ...

This story sounds like it is going to be very good however i found bits of it a little repetitive and confusing. the first paragraph starts off very well. I ...

Very good. Cleverly done. Like others i dont think it is a dramatic poem but i loved it. One point though Hey . . . wait a second It is ...