dafreak

great suspense at the end. im guessing this takes place somwere in the future? please add more ill be looking for it

I love it. I can feel the emotion in each line. I also like how you compared it mostly to a teardrop. i could feel the pain and struggle. overall ...

i love it. i think its got good structure. it starts off intresting and ends perfectly. i could feel the emotion through the whole thing. nice job.