coryab222

This has a descent rhythm, and I like the rhymes. I noticed that in the first few stanzas you switch your rhymes around - by that I mean you had ...

Okay, so this is very good. Your characters are great, and all of your description and imagery has got me hooked. There is so much that I cannot possibly point ...

No, I apologize too, then. I was mainly trying to point out the connection between lying and morals.

Thunder_dude... Of course that would be a great utopia when no one lies because it is against the law, and bullying does not exist. But how realistic is that? Would ...

I find that quote both comical and disturbing. When you think of the roles of politicians in our world and how much they influence the lives we all live, is ...

In my view, freedom of speech is freedom of speech. There really is not governmental authority to control the truths/lies a person tells. The truth of a lie, of course, ...

This is a great poem, but you really need to break up the stanzas in better places. Finish the thought before taking it to the next stanza. It will make ...

Eh... I can feel the emotion, but the structure of the poem made it rather unenjoyable to read. I prefer poems with proper stanzas and phrasing. There was virtually no ...

Woah! That was the best thing I have read on YWS. That was so good! Great, great, great job! Are you going to continue writing this or was it a ...

Dimension of Music Imagining music Sound moves through the soul Lifting me skyward Making me whole Imagining music The sound fills my ears The soft vibrations thrill me They are ...

The beginning was very nice and descriptive. I did feel that you had some run on thoughts in the first few paragraphs. Consider breaking up your long descriptive to multiple, ...

I do not side with the referee version of God, but I am not completely sold on the clockmaker idea either. I think God could be more of a clockmaker ...

The world cannot be dependent on one type of alternative power. Depending where you are and the resources you have, your energy source will have to change. So if you ...

That was nicely descriptive. Is this something you are planning on expanding on? As an excerpt it was pretty good, but as a reader I did not feel like the ...

I loved this! I think your friend is going to absolutely bawl when they read this. Great job.