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Re: The Curtain
Thin and frail, a little boy stood on his legs of sticks. His knobby knees stuck out awkwardly from the bottom of his dirty gray shorts. His belly was protruding ...
Mar 30, 2010 -
Re: Mary Jane
I really liked this poem a lot but I am not completely sure what is going on. Maybe that is the point. My favorite lines are "To falling Beats of ...
Sep 20, 2009 -
Re: The Window Curtain
Thin and frail, a little boy stood on his legs of sticks. His knobby knees stuck out awkwardly from the bottom of his dirty gray shorts. His belly was protruding ...
Sep 20, 2009 -
Re: Love lost
Most poems usually have some type of scheme. This doesn't seem to have one, or I could not find it. Its really not a bad thing, I hardly ever have ...
Sep 20, 2009 -
Re: Street Lamp
I think this poem is great. A sentinel of sorts, head bowed to the darkness, that was my favorite line. I am a little confused what the sentinel is doing ...
Mar 16, 2009 -
Re: Our God Reings
I liked your poem. But what i did not like about it was that the first two lines were extremely longer then the rest of your poem. It made it ...
Mar 16, 2009 -
Re: What book are you currently reading?
I am reading The World According to Garp by John Irving Its really great. If you are interested in quirky novels with odd characters it is the book for you.
Mar 15, 2009 -
Re: There's more to life than this
I enjoyed reading this. I like the message you are trying to send, or at least the message I interpreted from the poem. I think that it could flow better, ...
Mar 15, 2009 -
Re: I havent thought up a name yet
This is my first story that i have posted on YWS. I have more but I didn't want to post to much to scare you away. If it is still ...
Mar 15, 2009 -
Re: A nice winter swim
I think is poem is good but it could be SO Much better. I feel that I understand your poem but you could have used different, more descriptive words that ...
Mar 15, 2009 -
Re: Getting it
I like what you are writing about. I enjoy thinking about things like too. But the flow of the poem is not to hot. Its really repetitive during some parts ...
Mar 15, 2009 -
Re: Dining Set
The old maple wood of your antique armoire cases in a glorious dining set. Hiding away are those painted tea cups who share the story of this town with each ...
Feb 17, 2009 -
Re: Tehno-age
Honestly I am unaware of what this picture means. If there is a message you are trying to get across it has surely missed me. If i am being nice ...
Feb 17, 2009 -
Re: Autumnal Night
I really enjoyed the poem. Your use of vocabulary is quite amazing. I agree with Anna. I did not think that the word Tarnish flowed well. When I was reading ...
Feb 17, 2009 -
Re: fast pounding hearts
With quick moving hands And urgent lips. As if tossed in bed, we cling to each other. We are sweaty and the sheets are dirty. But were just lying now. ...
Dec 11, 2008
