borntoshop

I liked this. Very emotional piece of writing. So did you make up that poem? That was just...wow! I liked it :) Keep writing! Born

As the others said, i really didn't get what was going on. It was very very confusing. And the more confused i got the more i found myself loosing interest. ...

WOW! Speechless much? The emotion was really vivid ! It felt like i was there. It made me want to cry when he tucked in his kids and said good-night. ...

Hey, Born here again, as you asked :) *mistakes in red Okay now that you have edited it, i can see better why Gavin wants to kill her. Because he's...weird. ...

Thanks. I have edited it alot since i posted this, so alot of the structure sentences and long paragraphs have changed.

Thanks. I wrote this when i was bored, my English teacher says just write and see what happens. This is what happened for me. But i'm not going to finish ...

Thank-you! I can see where you are coming from. I tried to make Lindsay sound popular, by the way she gets pulled along by everyone (most bullies i know are ...

Thank-you i'll take your advice on board. :)

I REALLY enjoyed this. I have no nit piks. Great work, keep it up! Born xx

Thank-you for the tips. :) I wrote this quickly last night. I just felt so angry at bullies, and i just had to write something! All of the things that ...

This was an AWESOME piece of writing! I loved it!

WOW! I have no nit-piks. I LOVED this, it was amazing! You have a great vocabulary and it really shines through in this piece of work. Keep writing! Awesome! Born ...

I'm going to read it again! :D

I'm going to read it again! :D

Extremely touching peice of work! I'm so sorry about your mother, it must be hard to live with someone like that. I agree with everyone you should give this to ...