blackhike

Grimoire of the lesser spirits Chapter 1: A blood stained dream I've edited this many times, but some things have just recently been added, hope you enjoy. I stood amongst ...

this is a prolouge right, while try and keep it just that, a prolouge gives us a backgound information, your sentences were skippy at best, try lengthing this piece, maybe ...

Alright time to get nit picky, not to be mean but your first conversation "Eric hissed" kind of threw me off, pick a softer word because that one doesn't transition ...

ugh guys common I totally need some reviews, rip this work apart Plz.

- PLZ FOR THE LOVE OF GOD READ IT, AND THEN RIP IT APART, I NEED FEEDBACK GUYS- The air outside nips at my neck it was pretty cold. I ...

i gotta say your writing is fricknn amazing, I totally sync'd with your characters as if reading a real novel. You defiantly have an amazing talent and if you don't ...

hmm. I like your writing, its ery interesting but some of the words dont fit well into the sentences for exp "He has just shifted from North Carolina" A better ...

this piece was pretty confusing, over all the sentencing didn't mesh well. Every thing is very rushed. You don't give the reader time to learn about your characters, also theirs ...

Shockingly this seems like a great idea, I like the spin you put on lucifer and his family. not to many writers choose to put the anti-christ as someone good ...

in the beginning when he goes inconsiderate bitch, that's unnecassarry "Bitch" and then spit or something would give this piece more emotion. I agree with Pudin you started from in ...

good work o the writing and nice intro, you gave me a sense that this piece was just going to be another cliche. I think your ideas were strong, your ...

my advice even if youve followed a character through out an entire book, your story demands you to be flexible. If you get bored with a character so will the ...

"high five" to little tin fish garth nix is a great author. I reading at the moment the codex alera series by jim butcher. If you haven't read the series ...

this is surprisingly a great idea, never read a story anout a demon actually falling in love with a boy. One thing I thought was off... first of all I ...

I know your writing about the hardships of love, but I'm sorry I just don't think you poured enough emotions into this poem. Your feelings aren't expressed clearly enough, so ...