blackclaw1

So far i like what you're getting at, the last line for me harms the overall "experience" of the piece, it sounds somewhat like you've run out of ideas on ...

I really like the style of this, in a way i like the fact that i'm being told to appreciate the book it impies a great confidence in your work. ...

You seem to have the prose of the poem's reasonably well rounded, i would personally say that the content is the stumbling.The third work is the strongest of the four ...