Yatta!

Wow. I mean, I'm not a twilight fain either but...lol Nate = YWS God...lol Heaven has cheeseburgers? lol I can't writer a coherent note that was so funny!

I am inadequate. Continuously reaching for shooting stars Too far to even see, I’ve convinced myself I feel them. I feel stars, billions of light years away, Calling my name ...

Well, it seems I really only have one critique, to be honest. Just work on making your metaphors more concrete? There is a lot of sensuality and imagery, but I ...

Errr, "wine"? That's the best source of alcohol you can think of? Wine wouldn't be the best "lure" personally. Tequilla would be better...something potent that you only need a little ...

Excuse me for a minute, I am going to be blunt. WAIT A MINUTE!!!!!!! Achille's heel?!?! YOUR GREEK METAPHORS ARE OFF! His heel was a weakness, you can TOTALLY live ...

Just a warning. I am going to give you a real and clear honest critique. It might upset you, so if it does, stop reading after this first paragraph, but ...

Like a Fiddler? I would entitle it "Fiddler on the Roof" ;), wouldn't that be ironic. I'm sure you know of that old tale. In concerns to the poem at ...

Only one grammatical mess up: "Each lie of verse is frozen in picture, Each truth of song an infinite dance." Shouldn't "lie" be "line"? If it is right, then you ...

YATTA!'s Note: Err....i hope this isn't about slaves. I really really hope that's not where you were going. Nevertheless, this isn't honest. The emotions aren't real. It feels like a ...

Young trees and powder. Amateur cigarette butts on the porch Gonzo postcards from Madrid. A summer in Europe, an Englishman Living in Spain. And we WERE just sitting, when the ...

What's hobo talk. I wonder....

THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE HAS FAILED YOU!!!!! Please, don't write with the intention to rhyme, make it be a pleasant accident. If we were speaking italian, rhyming would be a synch, ...

You are telling and not showing. Poetry is not about telling people emotions. It's about showing them. You can't just tell people your sad you have find some way to ...

I don't want to be technical so I'm just going to give you general feedback: Things that struck me about your poem: 1) Really long: I feel like i shouldn't ...

I was thinking there was something off with the story and now, reading it through for the third time I realize what it is. You shift tenses. The first three ...