Yadi01

Thanks for the comments. I just realised that none of the words that were meant to be in italics were in italics, so I'll correct that. Also the story is ...

Thank you for you constructive criticism. I will change those small points. On the point of stars, you can't really have an afternoon dawn either, if we are being semantic. ...

Very powerful and emotional story. If you intended to invoke sadness and despair, you achieved it magnificantly. Excellent piece.

I really enjoyed this piece. In my own opinion, I thought the length was OK, but that's just my own opinion. Very sad as well. I guess it could be ...