Writersdomain

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 All right. Here is chapter 4. It's going to take longer to post because this is ...

More description might be good as Ares mentioned; however, I think that if you slowed down the pace just a bit it would be just as beneficial. I like fast-paced ...

This was an interesting beginning and definitely drew me into the characters. The overall idea seemed a little cliche to me (I could practically guess what was going to happen); ...

This was quite good. Your writing style is beautiful, and your characterization is usually good. This may just be my opinion, but I feel that the story moved a little ...

Love and Fascination Shriek brought up a point about Strick and Creiha that interested me (and this is no bash on ya, Shriek. You know I love ya. You just ...

Thanks for the comment, Shriek! I'll work on those adjectives - still recovering from my adjective binge. :wink: Ah, predictability. Fear not. Strick and Creiha do not hit off a ...

*hides*

Hallo! Welcome to YWS! This was very interesting - interesting idea to write from the perspective of the dragon. Royboy suggested you italicize or quote the dialogue; I agree. As ...

Thanks so much, Dark Lordess. :wink: If anyone could give me some character impressions (you don't even have to critique it, or even read the previous chapters... though that would ...

Other stories which are running through my head and distracting me from Tears... RasunaI To put it simply, the land of Belen is divided in two by a mountain range ...

Matthias sounds look an interesting character (not to mention that I adore that name). I don't know if you've done this or not, but I find that outlining a character's ...

So, I'm cutting chapter 3 down 'cause it's too long, Here is the last scene of chapter 3 - one of my favorites. Last section of chapter 3 Strick led ...

Tears is not going well at the moment. Sophie is killing me. For those of you who do not know who she is... Captain Sophie Pierce is the captain of ...

Ooooh, this was quite good, very intriguing. You've set up your characters nicely and begun to develop them. I hope you write more of this; I'd like to know more ...

-spoilers deleted-