Wolf

Wow! That is a truly amazing piece of art. It's so well done, what with the wooden lid and looks so real! I wish the lighting were better, but it's ...

I don't know what's with all the double-spaces, and it was really short. To be brutally honest, this wasn't...well, it wasn't very good. You need to add alot more detail, ...

One: The New Kid He gave me a crooked grin. My heart fluttered with excitement. He looked so gorgeous. This immediately made me think of 'Twilight'. You know, because Edwards ...

Thanks for the critiques everone! Squallz: I'll consider what you said about the dwelling deeper, but I really can't help it if my dreams are cliche. I know alot of ...

Thanks! I wonder what I'll dream of tonight...:P If it's interesting, I'll write it down. Maybe I should have a kind of dream journal or something...

My life was never really bad to begin with. My parents cared, i did well in school and I had lots of friends. I was very happy and I never ...

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Urg, I forgot to mention something else: Why did Faith just go along and decide to help the Griffins? Her meeting with Silven and his [nameless] mother was very short ...

-I'm continuing it now- Liquid fire gushed into the cell, hissing on the walls and making the prison grow heavier. The pain was immense. Lva curled around my body and ...

Ok, I agree with Seraph. Alot of music...action...it's all happening too fast. Put yourself in her shoes. Wouldn't you take a while to recover after going through all that? We ...

lol I started laughing so hard when I read this...right in the middle of Computers class! That is really a cool story! I loved it! All of the grammatical errors ...

Sounds like some dark, emotional (but not emo) fantasy book...definitely something I'd notice in a bookstore and beg my mom to buy ^^ Wolf Heart

My comments are in bold. I've underlined and/or barred out some of your writing and then commented underneath: Chapter Three “ What do you want Cory? I thought I told ...

Shadows mask my dreams No more time to pick teams The warmth that I love Flies off with the last black dove As my mind twirls like a cyclone It ...

omg. I read that...it's horrible. Why would people do that?