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Vettan


  • Poetry » Dramatic, General
    Re: Love

    Hey hey hey it's me again HO Ho ho! I will keep this review rather brief seeing how many things from my previous review can be applied to thing work ...

    Jul 14, 2013

  • Poetry » General, General
    Re: Myself; Yourself

    Hello, hello. I am Secret Santa HO Ho ho! The poem itself is alright but it definitely can use some improvement in a number of areas. The first big thing ...

    Jul 14, 2013

  • Short Story » Romantic, General
    Re: Just Friends

    Hello. This work sounds pretty interesting. There are a few things, though, that could be improved. For some reason the sentence about masks, at the end of paragraph 2, sounds ...

    Dec 14, 2011

  • Short Story » Romantic, General
    Re: Is It Worth The Pain

    Hello. It would be interesting to read chapter 1, this segment reads like a prologue and for the sake of this review I will treat it as such. It is ...

    Dec 14, 2011

  • Short Story » General, General
    Re: XXX

    I hope that you want my honest opinion and nothing else. The work so far is alright but there were a few things that deterred me from the story. First ...

    Dec 13, 2011

  • Short Story » General, General
    Re: Danny

    Great work. I enjoyed this work. I do have a few small but broad critiques in regards to this work though. The first is, for some reason, the dialogue was ...

    Dec 13, 2011

  • Short Story » Action / Adventure, General
    Re: Wake up Buttercup /page #5/

    Interesting work. Morning , it seems, already has covered the technical aspects of your piece so I guess I will try my best to critique a more subjective part of ...

    Dec 9, 2011

  • Article / Essay » General, General
    Re: Science: A boon or a bane?

    Interesting article but it seems to concentrate on two different themes that of science and that of human morality. Since it is probably a thought provoking work I will not ...

    Dec 9, 2011

  • Article / Essay » General, General
    Re: Fruitless Attempts With a Japanese Pen

    In all honestly it's absolutely alright. People have different ways of coping with what some call writer's block. I usually just take a break from writing and substitute it with ...

    Oct 12, 2011

  • Short Story » Fanfiction, General
    Re: Story 6 (Part 1)

    Hello. I will try to review the second part soon. I thought it was good, though, I think there are a couple of aspects of the story that could be ...

    Oct 8, 2011

  • Poetry » Narrative, General
    Re: Thoughts Of A Victim

    I was not expecting it to be so open in a sense but it was good. The last two lines of the first stanza had very odd rhyming to it. ...

    Oct 2, 2011

  • Short Story » Science Fiction, General
    Re: Mismatch - Fragments

    Interesting piece. I liked it but I did have a few problems with it. For me the beginning was a bit slow and stale. It felt like reading a textbook, ...

    Sep 25, 2011

  • Novel / Chapter » Romantic, General
    Re: Castle on a Hill- Chapter 2

    Another great chapter. I like how your tone, narration and dialogue is consistent with chapter 1. My only suggestion is to add more atmosphere. The events in this chapter have ...

    Sep 25, 2011

  • Short Story » General, General
    Re: xx-to delete

    The story is great and has an amazing potential. The only problem I had with it is that it left too many many aspects of the story unanswered and overall ...

    Sep 25, 2011

  • Novel / Chapter » Fanfiction, General
    Re: Hardships: This is Our Story (Chapter 1)

    I found the story to be very well written. The are only a two aspects that I would direct my attention to. In the story, mostly in the first half ...

    Sep 24, 2011


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