Twit

Nice in-between chapter. Some sentances didn't flow quite right, but otherwise: good! :D -ST

I liked this - okay, a little cliched beginning, and there were a few spellings and all, but pretty good! :D I didn't think the hallucination/vision was confusing *looks smug* ...

Normally, I'd say Incandescence (or however you spell that word - it shouldn't have so many letters in it) was being too harsh, but on this occasion I agree totally ...

"Don't worry, you two. No one missed you." ~Kallik

Phew! *wipes brow* Tammy's there, and Jamie's sounding a lot more cheerful! -Twit

Rats, he got shot. Why'd that have to happen? She had a fire inside of her Just "inside her" would sound better. Nice style of writing, and the part about ...

The hillside we trekked over was studded with rocks and rabbit holes. The centaur stepped carefully to avoid laming himself; Siren walked beside him with one hand on his side ...

:D AI= Artificial Intelligences? :lol: Very funny. . . .

Congrats! (Is there an echo in here?) :D

*starts to hyperventilate* "You see, I'm a character in a series of books that was my author's first attempt at writing something passable. It's been rewritten and rewritten, so not ...

Never talk to Fred anyway. He's in the chat room, isn't he? Never go there.

Yeah, that's something I have to remember, as I write in first person a lot. Try not to start each sentance with "I" and end each one with "me," and ...

Good next chapter! That's sad, even my reviews are ungrammatical. Anyway, very good! I don't see any mistakes. :D -Twit

I looked down from the hillside above the cave. Nark charged the riders like a mad thing, silently killing all that stood in his path, heedless of injuries. I shook ...

"Saddle my offspring with 'the Raven'? I don't think so." ~The Raven "Rather egotistical. No." ~Fal. "There's only room for one Rohsair around here." ~Rohsair "It would be too confusing." ...