Twit

'Tis good. :) Just don't carry on saying about Creiha's "forest green eyes" so much, and try not to repeat names either. Otherwise, I'm enjoying this. ^_^ As for characters ...

"I smell a cliche! Elven crackers? *rolls eyes* They weren't called lembas or cram, by any chance were they?" ~The Raven *hastily* "I'm sure they aren't, are they, unnamed elf ...

Yhe, very good! (DUH.) “I need to return home,” Creiha murmured, leaning away from Strick and beginning to turn around. “Let go of me! Leave me here – I don’t ...

But you still can't... PLEASE change it! You'll get accused of plagiarism... Ok, you won't, but maybe you could use another title? "The Leader"? "The One"? "The Teacher"? I don't ...

This actually happened? You get panic attacks? Sorry, that wasn't terribly diplomatic. Anyway, I thought that this was very good. It had feeling without laying the emotions on too thick. ...

S'arite. "Murtagh, how could you?" sounds too maudlin. Make the emotion here stronger.

Right. I wouldn't have thought raving and blubbing was Luke's style at all. And you ought to make it clearer who he's lost for those of us who don't read ...

The Master???? *screams* You can't do that you cant do that youcantdothat!!!!! Sorry, but.... you-cannot-have-a-character-called-"The Master". You can't. Nix. Zilch. Zip. Zed. Raxacoricofallapatorius.

Hi! Older married members... interesting. :) Anyway, hi and enjoy the site!

"Cookies! *grabs the whole plate of cookies and eats two before remembering that this is not polite behaviour* Oh, sorry, you want some?" *offers plate to logosgal's characters* ~Rohsair *rolls ...

Sorry Pol, I keep on reading this in the wrong order. :oops: The Shade sat down and was obviously breathing hard. Well, duh, if he's breathing hard, he's breathing hard. ...

Hi Sarah! I'm the Twit, abbreviate my name however you choose. You're a smart ten-year old - how nice, so was I! Nah, not really, i just like polishing my ...

They are cute, those things. :wink:

3/10 Never understood the SPEW thing. [It's a pun, MM. If you do something in dead earnest, it means you're really dedicated to it.]

3/10 Sound nice, but too ambiguous.