Twit

Good! There weren't nothing to nitpick, except this: “Never mind that, run for cover, idiot!” Fungal and Imp dived behind a sagging couch and Leah rushed for the desk, just ...

Lumme o neilly, that's real bashed up! :shock: But, yep, the main thing is you got out okay. Did you get checked for shock or anything? Or to make sure ...

*SQUAWK* :thud: Cliffhanger!??!?!?!! And in such a nonchalont way - “Hello Lyla. I’ve come to get my son.” I think the spelling of pajamas differs if you're American. Pyjamas in ...

I haven't read this chapter, my bad, as they say. :) All the tiny mistakes have already been pointed out, so I'll just say as how I liked! Especially the ...

She's like a guitar string that needs tuning; when you strum it, it sends off a wrong note. Richard's harmed her so she's out of tune from what she was ...

Oh, I like this new race you've introduced. Sk'iri. Nice, I like wings. :) FIRST BIT After she had her child, Jonahn gave both mother and baby (a little girl) ...

LOL, Cat and Annie are so funny! "I have come to conquer the world!" :lol: :thud: And I *do* think it would be good for Valery and deLucio together. Not ...

Woah, Fin's a prince? A king? The ruler? Why doesn't he want to be whatever his title is, I wonder? This was well written, but what I noticed is that ...

:D Good, like the first part! I like the way you write the gods as human, not putting them up on pedestals and making them all grand. This way it's ...

QEISAL: Where's your phoenix? ROHSAIR: Um... I lost it? QEISAL (shocked) : You lost your phoenix? :lol: Out of context, it doesn't make much sense, but I still like it. ...

Aw, he's so cute! Never seen that breed before. I think "Chase" is good. :) Or Fly? Fleet? Scout? Or he's brown so you could call him Clive. :lol: Explanation: ...

Oh lawks! The poor girl! That's so... urgh. Does it say what happened next? If the girl survived and if she's gonna sue or anything? I would, if I'd lost ...

*blinks* I'd thought he'd changed! I really did!! She stood, her shaking arms holding her up, her hair giving her a small piece of darkness that she could hold onto. ...

*Twit gets a bag of flour, hesitates, glances around, wipes her mouth, then swaps the pie for the bag of flour* Phew! I got the pie! *is about to take ...

Ouchie! That's not very reverent, but... :roll: I thought this was good; it created the scene well. Too well, hence said "ouchie!" I liked the repetition and capitalization of "Bound" ...