ToritheMonster

Aw, that was adorable. I wish everything was all cheery like that! You have some great talent for writing poems, keep up the good work! My only nitpick is the ...

Hiya! I see what you were trying to say in this poem, but it was a tad bit confusing. If you lengthen it and reword it a little, it would ...

Cute poem! I totally understand what you mean. Sometimes it's good to be invisible. You really captured a lot in just a few words, and that's only problem was the ...

Great job! My only problem was when you said: "Alec's breath fell against her nape." you would hafta say "the nape of her neck". I love your description of her ...

I think everybody else caught your errors, so I'll just say great job! I love your characters. I really was hating Terri by the end of the story, and feeling ...

Oh my gosh. I totally want to die (you know what I mean). My name is Tori and I would love to have a knife thrown at my back in ...

Hi! This was an awesome poem. I absolutely loved your imagery. However, I agree that your ending was a little weak. I'd tweak that if I were you. You have ...

I think Crazy covered it all. Just please, don't put it in bold. Normal print, please, normal print. Also, I, personally, didn't find your ideas all that original. The white ...

I completely agree with EdgarAP, except for the part about Ariane's character. I, personally, think it would be even more mysterious if we knew nothing about her at all, not ...

That was awesome! I think Lena caught everything I had found wrong. I, personally, loved your descriptions, though. But that's just me, you can't please everyone. I'll say leave 'em, ...

Great job on this! I don't know if there are other parts before this (I'm guessing there are), but this was fine on its own. I can't wait to read ...

Thanks. Now, to write part 2.... hmmmm....

Can I get another review, pleasey please? Anyone? Then I'll probably post the next part.

I hafta agree with Summer. This was way too much like Twilight and the ever-crappy Vampire Diaries. I, personally, am sick of all things vampire.You obviously have writing talent. Come ...

Ah. Filipino. I feel stupid. In that case, nice job on his dialogue. I don't have time now, but ill come back and point out what was wrong later. And ...