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ToritheMonster

ToritheMonster

  • Lounge, The Re: YWS Super Reviewing Bash on January 31, 2010

    RSVP!!! :mrgreen:

    Jan 26, 2010
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: My first story!

    Cute! PM me when you post something new, I like your work.

    Jan 26, 2010
  • General Articles Re: Deleted

    Deleted

    Jan 26, 2010
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: Torn Family

    Hey! Sorry for the sorta negatory vote, but that's just what I thought. You have tons of talent for describing, I just think you went a little overboard and you ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: 101 Ways to Die #2

    I have an idea for one for you, if you wanna take it! Some kids are told not to play in the water, but they do anyway. But..... holy crap! ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • General Fiction Short Stories Re: My Best Work

    Ummmmmmmmmmmmmm.Wow. That was creepy! This was really entertaining, though. My only problem: It just wasn't realistic. Girls don't throw paper wasps, at least not the popular ones. Girls also can't ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • Lyric Poetry Re: Would Could Should

    That was amazing! One of the best poems I've read all day, seriously. Just change the formatting to normal, ok? Also, make sure to keep your capitalization consistent. You have ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • Lyric Poetry Re: My carefull, claustral heart

    Nice poem. Here, have another two dancing elephants: :elephant: :elephant: This was cool. I like how you used words twice, adding rhythm. It was creepy and bitter, but still entertaining. ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • Lyric Poetry Re: Hint

    Hey there. Just wanna get this straight for alla you, it's YWS, not YSW. :) :) Nice poem though, and I like your use of parentheses. They were a nice ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: Tremors (For Haiti) - Edit

    That was amazing! You really captured just what it's like there in Haiti in just a few lines. That was complex, but not, both at the same time, you know ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: eye for an eye

    Totally, I agree with the others. Regardless, this was good for a thrown-together piece. Just add some emotion, a few adjectives, and make it more interesting. Round this out, and ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • Dramatic Poetry Re: You broke me.

    I love this one! Here, my fix-its in purple: You didn ' t just break my heart, You didn ' t just tear it apart, You ri pp ed it ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • General Fiction Novels Re: The Junior Accountant Chp. 3

    Hey again, looks like Pink caught most of my issues w/ this. Nice job on fixing up your tenses, they're less jumpy this time.I think you can catch all the ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • General Fiction Novels Re: The Junior Accountant (Chp.1)

    I dunno, my comp has issues and I have to repost the same review you'll see if you scroll up. Here it is: Hey, here I am with my promised ...

    Jan 25, 2010
  • General Fiction Novels Re: The Junior Accountant Chp.2

    My corrections in red.Asterisks mean I got rid of something. Jason had nothing to say, and even if he did it would come out of mouth as gibberish. Jason couldn’t ...

    Jan 25, 2010


"Cowards die many times before their deaths; but the valiant will never taste of death but once."
— Julius Caesar