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Re: The Day I Became A Mirror
The rhythm of this poem is wonderful, but please put periods somewhere in here. (Example places: after "crying," "last," a semicolon after "me," "away," "sanity." It works better to omit ...
Nov 3, 2015 -
Re: The Science Fair Project
Tense shifts- use "he had started" instead of "he started" because "he started" sounds like he's beginning the project again. After saying that, you can switch back into the less-clunking ...
Oct 22, 2015 -
Re: chiaroscuro
I love this poem! A few notes: 3rd stanza- no punctuation- something after freezer burn and omniscient cloud 3rd stanza- "wax together" and "freezer burn" are a little weird 3rd ...
Oct 22, 2015
