TNCowgirl

Wow good. I'll leave a better crit later when my brain isn't fried. Nudge me to do so. TNC

Wow, that is cool. Moves strange. But it's good. Sorry this is a sucky crit, on pain meds. But here it goes. Make it flow better. And Winters day. Is ...

Come on you really need to put more. I'm bored to death here and there aren't any other things to crit. :'(. Please Please Please post more. *Mods, if you ...

Keep going. One thing though, if they are in a hospital, he can't just walk out with her hands tied. There will be tapes and such. Ya. But keep going, ...

Supped up bug or not, that's a girl's car. You wouldn't catch me dead in it though. :P. Course I'm a little ol' country girl. Idon't like anything but trucks ...

You guys, Mattie hasn't been on in ages. Just wanted to let you know. It's a great story, really is, but Mattie hasn't been on and can't keep going. :'(

Wow! That was incredible! You really really did well on this. It was well thought out and well written. There wasn't anythign that I caught. Again good job. I don't ...

By her friend doing WHAT?

She did this, she did that. Alright, let the sentences flow a little more. I think this has good potential to be good. Pm me when you fix it or ...

Tell that, tell how she was jerked awake. Was there a knock a phone call, a what?

What now? she That s is supposed to be capatile. was jerked awake the next morning . Jerked away by what?

Ok, so parts of it are choppy, parts aren't. Also, there are several different things you need to capatilize. Other then that please keep going. TNC

Confusing. Very very confusing.

He is a vamp, and people acctually can't be in the sun when they have really sensitive skin. I'll fix that. But I didn't know werewolves ahd a problem with ...

Wow, that was really good and well done. There wasn't much I would've changed at all. Good job!!!!!!! I would give you a star, but uh, don't know how to ...