Swires

UNfortuneatley no, you see all magic users are poor. The Machambre crest(rulers of the terriotory) are wealthy nad opposed to magic, they have forced magic users into hiding under the ...

ignore

LOL! Funny stuff.

I arnt causing trouble or anythign but what is the point of that post, there isnt really need for it, just comment when you DO have time. Sorry I just ...

Thanks Fontroy, more reviews welcome.

I enjoyed it. ...though I also was looking forward to hearing more. But I rather liked the dream idea; it might have been slightly abrupt. yes I think that coild ...

LOL!, Tut tut jigsaw you naughty person. I tend not to correct spelling because I'm a culprit for bad spelling as well through typos and it annoys me when all ...

I liked the story but didnt like the first sentence, "It was a sunny day" just didnt really absorb me into the tale.

Again good job, paced out story. However Italics are usually used for thoughts, I would put all the phone conversation in speech marks to avoid confusion by the readers.

The dsecription was good but what was the purpose of this piece? Was it to introduce your character? Because I could not see one little hint of what the plot ...

WEll done, yes the rewrite has made it alot better, I like the n ew end line better. You are a quick writer, unlike me who it takes forever to ...

With a skim through the story looks good, the last line makes me want to carry on reading it, good job. i may crit more when the next bit is ...

Nice moral story, are you going to extend on this, make a story out of it?

Well im outlining the whole story currently, so after that Imay go onto to do some word building, I reckon in a week it will be out.

alive when he killed Max. You have given away the next hit, so Max is killed?