Snoink

My Irish ancestors came to America out west to mine for precious minerals. They spoke English. When my great-grandmother (who has French-Canadian roots) was living in the early 1900s (she ...

Moo! Moo! Moo! “Moo! Moo! Moo!” I said to the cow. He only stared at me with a scowl. He chewed on his cud. Said, “I speak English, Bud.” And ...

Designer Purse Don’t give me a designer purse: Those are the worst of the worst. They’re big! Gigantic! And they’ll fit Anything that you put in it. Your wallet which ...

Ode to Flour Taste it: the dry white powder is Bland, boring — it’ll choke you up If you can even stomach it. And yet, pair it up with simple ...

I blame this on my husband. :P Seussian Love We can talk about love Or we can talk about snuvs! (We can talk a long time about snuvs and their ...

What is this witchcraft?!

God Give Me Grace Well, he said, with a sad smile on his face, That, with my tears in my eyes, looked woefully misplaced, You can make a tally and ...

Remember: When it’s time for your toddler to go to bed And she screams and cries as you march ahead, And yells so loud her face is blue, And crashes ...

To My True Love Truer love has never been known From my love, my spicy burrito, Wrapped up in a blanket of plain tortilla And paired with a virgin margarita. ...

HI. I spent my spare time cooking today, because I am AWESOME. Here's a lame poem... Right on time! I can’t think of any proper rhyme -- But the pizza’s ...

...part of me wants to edit this terrible poem to actually be good and part of me is like, "HOLY SMOKES, I AM SO BEHIND." Follow the Money “Follow the ...

...DUDE. I'm Snoink! I have to write a poem about pigs. It's like... a law or something. When Pigs Flew Today, something happened — a wondrous thing! All the pigs ...

...this might possibly be my strategy for NaPo... >.> Poetry Gnomes When you need to write a poem, You should first consult a gnome. Tell them your beginning line And ...

WHAT HAVE I GOTTEN MYSELF INTO?!?! *sobs* Anyway, the first poem... * The problem with those butterflies Is that all they say are lies, lies, lies. They’ll tell you that ...

At first, I was like, "YAY." Then, I was like, "WAIT. WHAT." Then I despaired. The YWS toilet is bad enough in its current quarters... how is that even supposed ...