Rydia

The other parts seemed to have some rather extensive critiques by Myth and others so I thought I'd just comment on this one... I stared at the building , a ...

A few suggestions for structure etc... I made a wish today; I wished my family didn't argue, That nobody was dead. I wished there was no fighting But I have ...

I closed my eyes, silently begging [Maybe hoping would be better here?] to wake up from the nightmare I assumed I was having. I was still struggling, but Lena was ...

Thank you very much for the comments! I shall make a change or two...

The theme is nice but it's lacking a little description and I agree that parts of it were repetetive. I feel the lurge of a boat On this line, I ...

Hi there and welcome to YWS! I don't collect rocks exactly but I do have a huge gemstone collection adn I love drama so that's one interest we share if ...

Ah... Don't get me started on debates about abortion... As for the poem, there's a good use of vocabulary, though perhaps a little too good. Some writers will look at ...

Welcome to the site Kristin. Pm me if you want a critique on any of your work, Heather xx

Some of the imagery of this piece was nice and the theme of nature worked well but I felt that it could do with a more regular rhythm and I'd ...

Wow. Random. I'll never have that many posts... But I nearly have 6000 points =)

I'm not so sure about the tops they're wearing but the hair has been done well and the choice of colours is good.

The poem is pretty but like Whence said, it's rather cliche. I'd like to see some really in depth imagery here and some thought provoking faults that you've found withing ...

Kitty finishes her first drink and edges past the crazy people, back to the bar. "What snacks do you have?" Kitty queries. "Well there's sugar..." Snoink grins.

I second 1984 and would like to add 'Of Mice and Men' by John Steinbeck. My sister did a similar thing recently and she used one book called 'Do Androids ...

I like the internal rhyme of this piece, it seems to keep the rhythm going and gives it a rather sinister atmosphere. Very fitting. Also, your imagery is imaginative and ...