Rydia

Another purple member here, hehe. I always have a spare hour or two so just send me a pm if you have something you want critiqued. In fact, I shall ...

Julia "Would you stop that?" Warren demanded. "Stop what?" I asked with an innocent smile. "Holding on like that," He replied, averting his eyes from my hands. I grinned again ...

Kate I watched as a silvery substance escaped from my wand and was momentarily disapointed when it took on no form but then I willed myself to think stronger, happier ...

This is a really pleasant little poem. Your rhyme and rhythm are simple, yes, but very effective and some of your imagery is beautiful. With these poems, I usually find ...

Hi there, it's nice to meet you and don't worry, I'm pretty sure that you're not too old. In fact, you're only a few years older than our wonderful Administrator ...

Hey Jabber! I think you've made a really good start here but perhaps Autumn should be seven rather than five? I can see that you want her close to the ...

I'm guessing the username you wanted is InkblotonthefaceoftheEarth? Well welcome to the club Ink. I've read some of your sister's work so I shall be expecting a high standard from ...

Lilly I made a move to chase after Daklana but Kate placed a hand on my shoulder. "We're better off without her," Alexynia stated. I nodded and gently shook Kate ...

Just a little typo first before I make some more general comments - She took it and stood up to o . Okay. Well this part was nicely written but ...

You have a nice start here but this needs expanding. Add a little description of the scenery and some characterization. You tell us the persona is all alone but show ...

The others have made most of the points I would so I wont repeat them but I would like to say that this is brilliant and so easy to relate ...

I thought this was good and I like the description of Marisol but perhaps a little more description of Jose would be nice. Also, I think you use the perfect ...

Melody I screamed in pain as the ground around us exploded and bold flames etched patterns into my skin. I was thrown to the hard, scorching ground and I raised ...

Kate I hurried down to Defence against the dark arts and bit my lip worriedly as I entered the classroom. A few other students were already in and they turned ...

Louise (The name of my runner's human) Slowly, one by one, we approached the counter, ordered our drinks and greeted Max. "I'll have a hot chocolate please," I ordered with ...