Rydia

Melody "Of course, if you don't join us, that might be reason enough to kill you..." Ryaka grinned mischeviously and I couldn't help but smile and giggle. "And you think ...

Coal I nodded at Sara as she drained her glass and she nodded back. We were distantly aquainted or at least, she was distantly aquainted with this me. The real ...

No problem. Kalilah We waited another hour or so for the cover of dark and then we edged the door open as quietly as possible and the two younger girls ...

Coal I smiled as I listened to the girl talking to the bar keeper. The others wouldn't be so easy to turn against the king but she already harboured some ...

Thanks for pointing that out Reyu and thanks for reading =)

Kalilah "Then the next smallest," Nina suggested logically. "That would be me," One of the girls I didn't know smiled weakly as she held up her hand and then let ...

The others have caught most but here are a few mistakes - Khor took it and said “Stand.” [Don't leave two lines between these sentences.] Khor returned him his sword ...

I'm back. Okay so here's how I'd do the other two - Story two - [A touch, or press of the lips against someone's mouth or other body part as ...

Name= Coal. No last name and no real first name, just Coal. Age= Mid twenties. Hair= Black. Eyes= Black. Complexion= Medium tan to dark. Attire= Black. The style of clothes ...

Dahlia The news spread rapidly throughout the camp and wherever I walked amongst the soldiers, there was silence. A whole squad. And not just any squad. Our main squad. Wiped ...

Kalilah "Thanks," I replied and encircled the astonished boy with my arms before kneeling by the door. I inserted the nail into the lock and used my slim, delicate fingers ...

Melody Tamora turned to Sonaine and hesitated. "She was merely interested in meeting the girl, High Lord, and we thought it best to let her. Melody needs people her age ...

Okay so I've started the critique but I'm tired now and have to be up early tomorrow but here's what I have so far and I'll finish it tomorrow. I ...

Name= Kiara Age= 20 Hair= Long and raven black Eyes= Violet Figure= Kiara is tall and slim Complexion= Almost as pale as ivory and easily as smooth and flawless Race= ...

Congratulations Mel! If I was pregnant, I'd hope for a boy but that's only because I want twin girls and a boy and I don't think I could handle twins ...