Rydia

Add more description, that always helps a bit and try not to rush it. Take another look at your more important scenes and spend more time on them, add a ...

I think this would benefit if you used standard punctuation (Capitals for starts of new sentences etc) but generally it's pretty good. You have a nice rhythm, some effective rhyme ...

It's lovely to meet you Jake and welcome to the site! I love medieval writing so I'll probably take a look at some of yours when you've posted it. Who ...

I have a mixed opinion on this part, dear. I think you need to add just a touch more personality so that the reader can attach themselves to your narrator. ...

Hello Via! You have a good start here but the detached tone started to irritate me a little. I can see that it's essential to get the facts across without ...

Lydia "That's a good question. If you mean to ask 'what is my name' then it's Lydia but if you want to know 'who I am' that could take a ...

If you say so... Luke "Do not raise your voices here. The camp are sleeping and this situation will be hard enough to explain already without the general low on ...

Gregory How bothersome! To be stuck in the parlour, apart from my business and cold and miserable too at that. To be fair, my dear cousin had found me dry ...

Scipio tried to hold the faces in focus but his head ached and it felt as though all his memories, all his life were seeping out through a hole straight ...

I'll begin now. And just to be clear, here's a quick list of current credits - Via - Used - 8. Available - 5. Piepie - Used - 0. Available ...

Thank you! Let me know what you want critiquing.

Yes, I did sort of warp the idea from VG Rumble but you forgive me, don't you? Via - you can have empathy for four credits which means you now ...

Raven "Time to go," Luke spoke briskly as we arrived back at the camp, horses and supplies in tow. "Shouldn't we eat first?" Warren asked as he reluctantly dragged himself ...

I think it's a reasonable idea though I'd suggest to make it a temporary or infrequent basis. Like, it could be hosted at christmas for a christmas ball and perhaps ...

Thank you, that's very encouraging =)