RockGoddess

thanks for the advice ill keep it in mind

Hey, im new! well my 1st poem wasnt mine i asked sum1 else 4 help n they offered 2 write it all 4 me cuz she had a great idea, ...

You're fist, my scream - darkness. Everytime i look at you all i feel is coldness; This is my life. So I take this knife and i slash through flesh; ...

Thanks for the advice, i will try to improve this using the tips you gave.

You seem to use fullstops nearly all of the time you should try useing commas or semi - colons, this would give a better effect to you're writing

The crowd was famished by degrees, except for two Of an enormous city did survive, And they were enemies; They met beside The dying embers of an altar-place Where had ...

hey becka wheres me :-( lol