Pepper60

Hiya! :] Really nice read! Super cute :] Reccomendations..... -I'd say you could describe things a bit more, for example the physical things the main character feels (possibly shaky hands ...

Hiya! Really good start! I so want to know what happens next :) 1) You could put something about what led her there. Why is she in the forest? Is ...

Hello hello! Well I really like this :) I love the way you described the room; the deep crimson silk curtains. Lovely :) One suggestion I have... In this part... ...

Hello :) There are a few mistakes which curiousvampire has pointed out, watch out for 'their' and 'there' and your tenses. When you say "Because I failed my last bet ...

In the first paragraph where it says: "A gas station had exploded obliterating an antique store next to it, and toppled traffic lights." There are two tenses going on here... ...