PenguinAttack

Ma'am Sam of the moddity. ^^ You're awesome. I've altered that line. I might change it again later, depending. Also, you flipped to the naughty rather rapidly. ;) *Hearts* Le ...

Edited. :D

Hullo kiddo. “My body is a rag doll,” - I think you can drop the comma here. “dripping down my face,” - I think you can lose this line. It ...

I don’t know how much of a comment I’m going to be able to give you. I’m really liking this. You end on a fantastic line, really. It’s not what ...

Based on paragraphs! ^^ 1. Personally, I like this. You have a good feel of an almost stream of consciousness here. I think, considering the beginning references to the writing, ...

I love the narrative itself, it’s intriguing and I would love to know some more. ^^ Which means that when you come out with another chapter you must hit me ...

Thanks, everyone, for the comments. ^^ Lyn > Yes, it was to avoid the rhyme, any rhyme would have ruined the feel of the poem. You kids are awesome squared ...

Hahahhaha, old people. Happy birthday, Curves and Grif. May you both spend much of your old-time being happy, healthy and free. Much love. ^^ *Hearts* Le Penguin.

You are awesome to the power of ever, Lyn. ^^ I wouldn't mind if you perhaps took a glance toward my newest poem, "What A Disguise Love Is" : I've ...

“His dark eyes grinned fiendishly. “You'd rather pay in blood?”” - Okay, my only real nitpick is here... “fiendishly” – what does that even look like? xD It just seemed ...

“Isaac awoke the next day to find one of the foretopman standing over him” - “Fore-topmen” Perhaps would look a little less confusing? Also “men” when you’re using plurals. “A ...

Thank you all for the fantastic comments so quick. You are all beyond the awesome in my book. All of your comments go on board with my edits - and ...

I am so very interested in this, dear. You write very well, and I've been caught up in how the story is progressing. I have nothing to nit pick or ...

“Yes, mummy?” he replied. The small boy placed his book on his lap and looked up, wriggling his toes underneath the threadbare blanket. - I think you can take out ...

Isa neeeedy. :p I was wondering if I could perhaps have you glimpse this: It's called "What A Disguise Love Is" *Hearts* Le Penguin.