OneSun

Hi, just a short one then! This isn't really a story yet, more an extract, it would be worth developing on the topic though. It the start to the day ...

Hi! This is a good piece, quite inventive and origional however there are a few things that need to be checked, mostly grammar! Firstly, you start in first person then ...

Hi! To start with, although there isn't much here yet there is potential for a good story as long as you make sure you keep it origional, detective stories can ...

To my dearest Black The earth does shiver With rain upon my back Hand in hand Across the desert Heat stroke and burning faces Dark moon hovers And the desert ...

The setting sun lit the final dying sky like the embers of a burning burial pile. The intense and electrifying beauty was somewhat subdued by the end of the world. ...

Hello! To begin with I think this has great potential as a first chapter. It's got a lot of intrigue that could lead the story to various places, your characters ...

Hello! I know you've already had a fair few replies but the more the better eh? Firstly I think the idea has potential to move forward, you have made a ...