NewWriter

**pokes zankoku_na_tenshi** Please hurry.

**bump**

Well, I came back to edit my post, and lo and behold, I couldn't! Oh well. I wish this didn't count as a review, because it's not really a good ...

I said it had nothing to do with the movie in the subtitle.

YAH!!!! I did it again! Yay me! Anyway, on to the real part... In the Interlude: “ … Yes.” I don’t think you need the ellipsis. In the main chapter: ...

lol. One of my friends ("Becca Reinhardt" in the story) found this and printed it out and passed it around the sophomore girls' class yesterday. They all thought it was ...

Shall be back for a proper critique within the week.

Zankoku: yes, I like those changes. Ugh. You wouldn't believe how much more horrible the part at the end sounded in the first draft. Blech. I was going for a ...

Oh, gee. Is there a point in posting here when everybody says it better than I do? I liked part 2 better than part 1 for some reason that I ...

Yeah, everybody said the stuff I was going to say, so all I can say is... STAR STAR STAR!!!!!!! Sorry for the very unhelpful (is that a word?) review.

This is my first big critique, so if I’m doing something wrong please PM me. It’s very nit-picky, so be warned. The flat ground stretches ahead of us for miles ...

First, if you're going to write something religion based, tell people at the top. Some people get offended, which isn't good. Okay, fixed. Thanks.

just struck me that this is really a kind of appropriate time to post, if you catch my meaning...anyway: “Little girl, would you lend your brother to me for a ...

I would really likes some crits. Feel free to tear it apart, since it's got to be majorly edited before I can submit it to my school's arts magazine. (And ...

*shivers too* Oh, wow. And wow. And more wow. Everybody got the mistakes I saw, so: Seriously creepy ending...and yet it leaves one hanging. This is going to be way ...