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Re: DAY
The first three lines are good, but the poem slips from there. The quiescent motion captures me like a frame capturing a portrait What does this mean? Your imagery is ...
Jun 28, 2010 -
Re: The Review Day Check-In Thread
Twelve, and I finally got my fifth star, lol. Well, we're in the home-stretch now and it looks like we'll hit 500 reviews and then some before this is over. ...
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: Be a Little Crass
Heh, Crass sounds a bit contradictory. If they're anti-Christianity and anti-Capitalist, then doesn't it take courage to be a Christian Capitalist in their presence? They're pro-courage, so that shoul
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: Secret
I normally don't like romance poems, but this was actually pretty good. It shows polish, and the fact you've already incorporated some of the critiques shows that you care about ...
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: Treasures of Paradise (A Robin Hood Gang Spinoff)
I really liked this. Reminds me of a 1930s mystery novel. “I’m part of organization”, he sputtered out, “One that’s a little short on money. Need some rich folks to ...
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: Detective Manpuddin on "The Explosive Tomato"
Haha, I actually rather enjoyed this. Tell your brother to keep writing.
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: Life Beyond Borders Of Man
I'm going to take a guess that this piece of prose is meant to mark the occasion of the Australian apology to the Aborigines back in 2008. Not everyone will ...
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: The Review Day Check-In Thread
The sun has been shining all day, which is extremely rare for where I live, and the local swimming pool was calling my name... 8) Haha, swimming does indeed beat ...
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: The Review Day Check-In Thread
Eight. Anyone who does less than me is the laziest McLazy on Lazy street.
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: Love
You may be singing this, but if you're posting it, you should at least run a spell-check on it. Otherwise, I'm left with the impression that you don't care about ...
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: YWS News
Sounds good!
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: Young Love
Ten year olds walking around like that? That's more than a bit odd. In any case, you posted this in Non-fiction so I'll critique it. This is an article, so ...
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: Makes you think
Interesting plot ending; very Twilight Zone esque. However, at the moment, the story needs a lot of polishing. As Kyllorac pointed out, there are a lot grammar mistakes. And as ...
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: Project Kratos
I think Evi and Lauren caught most of the story-telling and grammar snafus, so I'm going to concentrate mostly on the sci-fi aspect of it. The Setting The year for ...
Jun 27, 2010 -
Re: The Review Day Check-In Thread
Four for me, lol Just another quick note: There have been more reviews in the past 24 hours than ever before in YWS history. At the moment, there have been ...
Jun 27, 2010
