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Re: Short Story
I had to remove the story due to contest regulations, sorry.
Oct 22, 2009 -
Re: The Real World - Prologue
The structure of it seems a little confusing. I looked and fixed it up a little, this is just a little fix for the structure. Nobody said that my life ...
Oct 22, 2009 -
Re: Remembrance Day Poem
Thank you so much for taking the time to look at my poem. I have gone through it, following advice and now I think it is much better. It might ...
Oct 12, 2009 -
Re: Baqiyyah's Lilies
The first stanza seems out of place with the rest of the poem. It is a very interesting piece of work though, keep it up!
Oct 11, 2009 -
Re: Memories (before and after)
Very interesting, but the rhyming structure is confusing. Are you trying to make lines rhyme at certain points or just anywhere in the play? Good, but not great with some ...
Oct 10, 2009 -
Re: Present (it's not good at all)
That is quite short, it does sound like something I have heard before. Try to throw something interesting in there and mix it up a little. Keep writing.
Oct 10, 2009 -
Re: Nero's Dream
Excellent use of writing however, the structure and actual meaning of the poem remain unclear. There are things to question such as ‘it’ and ‘your’ (who are they) which is ...
Oct 10, 2009 -
Re: Fear
Hello, I find it very interesting to use a variety of fonts and sizes to create emphasis in your poem it really fascinated me. For areas of improvement, I would ...
Oct 10, 2009 -
Re: Remembrance Day Poem
This poem is for a contest on Remembrance Day, I would like some feedback to make it as excellent as possible. Hope you enjoy! :smt001 --- A Soldier’s Last Prayer ...
Oct 10, 2009
