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Re: Tender Mourning
The grass leaks With emerald-green light Which I savour tenderly In my melting brown eyes The sun cries For all its lost, For all its mourned, In its crooked light ...
Jul 21, 2009 -
Re: Bonnets, Bows
Hi Demi! This poem's beautiful - it's stuffed full of beautiful imagery and the title is very intriguing. Bonnets, bows day at seaside wind blows sand into eyes and you ...
Jul 21, 2009 -
Re: Almost Lovers
Hi! Ali here! This was a very interesting and well-written piece. I loved it! :D Now for the nit-picks: As she looked up to see who I meant - though ...
Jul 21, 2009 -
Re: Twiligt Spoof
Hi! I really liked this - it was funny, and well-written. I loved it how you twisted the story-line completely, yet managed to keep some of the original story as ...
Jul 21, 2009 -
Re: The Boy Who Cried Wolf
Hello there! Let me start off by saying that this is a truly amazing piece - it's so beautifully written, and it's very intriguing. I'm not very good at reviewing ...
Jul 21, 2009 -
Re: Pure White Lies
Set modern times, a girl begins to mysteriously fade into another world - one where she'll find all that she's ever looked for, but also the biggest dangers she's ever ...
Jul 18, 2009 -
Re: Lies
I really liked this - it seemed very realistic and the emotions were portrayed just right. Just a few things: I thought, secretly she was the reason why I had ...
Jul 18, 2009 -
Re: The incredible journey
I agree with Hero - it's a great idea for a story, very interesting and intriguing. In some parts it's not very clear - when, where, why?... but apart from ...
Jul 18, 2009 -
Re: Facing Endless Sorrow - chapter 1
This is actually really good! It's easy to read and makes me curious as to what happens next. What kind of parents would put their child up for adoption like ...
Jul 18, 2009 -
Re: The Sense of Danger. Part 1
Hello there! This is very short, so I can't do a proper review - but I can point out the mistakes: At this quiet day you hardly hear anything. This ...
Jul 17, 2009 -
Re: Missing - chapter 4
I've already changed the last chapters according to the reviews, and just to make it clear the main character doesn't know more than the reader. Anyway, please help me make ...
Jul 17, 2009 -
Re: The Faceless
This is AMAZING. It's so well written and I only found one typo: Though thje Faceless followed him every step of the way, It gave me the shivers. I could ...
Jul 16, 2009 -
Re: Molly
Hello! This is a good start but I suggest you read over it. For now, it's very hard to read - the sentences are long and missing commas. This makes ...
Jul 16, 2009 -
Re: Violent father and mother
This is too short to be properly reviewed, but I can point out the errors. I'll put my corrections in bold and my suggestions/comments in brackets. "What do you think ...
Jul 13, 2009 -
Re: Inglorious Innocence
Wow - this was interesting! Just a few things: Suddenly her party had arrived, Take out the 'had' - that makes the sentence go too far back. Also, there should ...
Jul 11, 2009
