Leja

Prefacing your story with character profiles is a cop out. I can see how it might work if the story revolved heavily around mechanical themes and imagery, but as this ...

This seemed very confused. All the ideas are here, but pay closer attention now to language and word use; it seems a bit raw now. Watch the words ending with ...

This reminded me entirely too much of Stephanie Meyer's Twilight series. A lot of this story was "x happened, then x happened, then x happened". Specifically, the first paragraph. Try ...

I like how you end your paragraphs. I like the summation of them. so the canned asparagus was off when he got to it.. I don't understand? And is that ...

My hand was definitely twitching towards the "Post Reply" button :wink: And Snoink, since when is donut chatspeak for don't?

Yay! *confetti* Good job, Via :)

There are two very conflicting styles of writing in this letter. First, there's the reminiscent feeling of "we shared crayons and blocks" and "young love. That's what it was" etc., ...

I like the feeling of desperation in the first stanza; the sentence breaks for conjunctions and the repetition of "like". There was something about beginning the "but his photographs..." that ...

Hello there! I see you're new, so welcome! I checked your portfolio quick, but it's empty? If you're looking for help with literary works, it's best to post them in ...

This totally happens to me. What I do sometimes is write outside my normal genre. Like, I usually write pretty realistic stories, so if I'm just looking for something to ...

Also I'm in a bit of a writer's block, to tell ya the truth. Aren't we all :wink: Best of luck finding inspiration!

I particularly like "drug" as well. Though there is the sense of smudging, as in pastels, I also intended smudging, as in incense . But as it is "our palms" ...

They'll age and die just as we do, I thought this quote had a funny rhythm? Too many sounds, maybe, in the "just as we do". An apt response to ...

"Look, Via and Kitty, there's the My YWS button!" Amelia pointed to the top of the ceiling, still so far away. "How are we going to reach it?"

Where do ghost towns stand legally? Are they like protected sites that people can visit but not modify? Or if like, a hundred people decided to suddenly go live there, ...