LaurenOutLoud

Wow, that was, wow. Amazing story I must say. Though I would be lying if I said I wasn't just a bit confused at the end. Such as, how did ...

Well, I saw a few grammatical errors, such as when you put 'there', you should have put 'their'. There were also a few sentences at the beginning that didn't really ...

That had a lot of emotion. I liked it. :smt001 It could have better fluency, but it's not bad. If you want some ideas for the title, how about Invisible ...

Well, there was one or 2 missing apostrophies and I saw some un-needed capitilization once or twice. And you put 'apart' where I think you meant to put 'a part'. ...

These were really nice! The last one flowed together nicely. The second one could have some more fluency to it. The first one was also a good poem, the last ...