Kaurin

Hi...there's really nothing more I can say or critique since Kyle did a really amazing job. I didn't even realized so much can be improved :oops: But - correct me ...

I agree with the comment of this story being rushed. Before I could really tune it, the story ended, and sort of in a predictable way too. What I can't ...

I'm quite captivated by your story! Especially the sudden twists, like when it wasn't her Dad after all. But I did notice some grammar mistakes, perhaps you would like to ...