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Re: Chapter 2. The Victim
I thought this piece was really gripping. I am already addicted to your lillie book, how much have you done now? The night was silent; the moon hovered overhead like ...
Jun 17, 2009 -
Re: Prologue to Heartless
I enjoyed this. A lot. The start is good. However there are a few pointers you could improve: 'Cara Hart had survived ordeals in her life, but nothing like this.' ...
Jun 3, 2009 -
Re: It only gets worse - chapter 1 - adapted :)
I've read most of this but i just wanted to say a little bit about what you can do to improve. Perhaps give the characters a little description, however leave ...
May 7, 2009 -
Re: Racing Wind- Chapter 1- Edited
Just a few pointers to improve: * Quote: One of the drunks lumbered up behind me, he was only four or five years older than me but he still had ...
May 6, 2009