Karsten

Hi Rebel, I’m glad you’re writing in my favourite genre! I hope I can give you some useful tips. As we discussed in chat, I thought the prologue was a ...

Hi twilight tiger, I just read your two chapters back to back, so I’m going to do a joint review. Overall, I found this story quite brief and confusing. The ...

Why has this thread been resurrected from the dead? I just wasted my time writing up a review for someone who hasn't logged in since October 2006. :? edit: This ...

Hi Tanya, Having read all 15,000 words you’ve posted to date, twice, I think I can explain the rejections you’ve received for this novel. This review may sting, so please ...

Hi A. M., Review as per your request. :) Overall, I’m afraid I wasn’t quite as hooked as cheez_burger. I found the piece quite brief: you’ve crammed several life-changing events ...

Hi peanut, I’m not a huge reader of

Hi Stella, I enjoyed the writing throughout this piece, and the strong first line and dramatic opening hooked me, but ultimately I found that my interest petered out as the ...

Hi Moriah, Per your request, I’ve read this story all the way through from the beginning. Overall, I’m feeling a little ambivalent. It’s easy to read, your prose is fairly ...

Hi Stealth, I'm not sure if you read my review of your previous chapter. There's always a risk with forums that you're throwing your reviews into a black hole where ...

Hi Stealth, I noticed that you have some really great feedback on grammar, but not a lot of big-picture comments, so I figured I'd pop in and show you a ...

Hi Random, Overall, I agree with earlier posters that this feels generic. The beginning follows a particularly cliched format typical to a lot of YA stories. First, the protagonist's vital ...

Hi JRS, Just a quick comment today. I had a plausibility issue with the core concept here. Your piece revolves around someone who wants to join the military. In an ...

Hi 82manycookies, This reads as if you wrote it in a hurry. The bones of the story sound like they could be fascinating, and there's plenty of potential for conflict ...

Hi showtimecircus, The prose here is clear and I was able to follow this story from beginning to end. I did have a range of problems which interfered with my ...

Hi Whisperer, This story dropped me with a bang within 350 words, and I want to show you why I had such a quick and strongly negative reaction to it. ...