Kang227

In terms of the organization of the story itself: If this is a journal/memoir/what have you, you really could expand this quite a bit. As a journal entry, I'm thinking ...

Interesting. A journal? It seems more like a memoir that he expects to be published, an autobiography of his accomplishments. If that's the case, this guy is obviously an egotistical ...

Expose.

This may be part of the character of your narrator, but from the very first paragraph he seems a little too flippant. Also, the style is a little bit off. ...

This is an excerpt from a project I dip into once in a little while. It's a history written by a character who is the son of a survivor of ...

Schizo? Heck no. It's just a matter of a good imagination and the ability to control your own dreams at will.

Dag, this damnably despotic dictator demands denouncement.

Quick FYI, Potentate tends denotes a ruler who wields political AND religious power. In case it matters.

A friend of mine wrote a fantasy book that I trudged through, being a good friend and all. This is the prologue with my commentary. As the book gets worse, ...

Fuhrer? Hi, here's a can of worms. Oh, you've already opened it. But, seriously, try anything from "Potentate"...heck, I dunno. Look around.

Yeah, we consult once in a while. To be honest, my characters act a bit like Deadpool (for you comic fans)--they poke fun at the fact that they aren't really ...

Halloway's expedition is some great stuff, though Navidson's final expedition and its result was laid out brilliantly.

Self-centered horndog would be an apt description.

This is called being bored in an English class. Now, I know you men are tired from a long day of fighting our enemies and raping your slaves. Luckily I ...

OH. MY. GOD. That is all. Those who know, know. Those who don't know, FIND OUT.