Kale

I could tell a harsh life had hardened him and he would be a worthy traveling companion. How does he know this? There's very little shown us about Victor that ...

The man eyed me suspiciously, probably wondering if I would dirty a bath up beyond repair. This sentence struck me as rather abrupt and lacking transition from the previous chapter. ...

Here as requested. First impression: Wow. That green is really bright. Why is it there? Oh. Translation note. Why is that there? Whatever happened to using plain old English or ...

I see you already took sarg's suggestions to heart. There are still a few areas that could use some polishing, namely the beginning: So, when King finished talking to himself ...

Late, but my thread's called (Un)Timely Reviews for a reason. XD Before I tackle the content, there are a couple of technical things that need pointing out, namely punctuation and ...

I don't have much to say about this chapter: it was pretty solid, and aside from some odd wordings here and there, usually from trying to use descriptive words, it ...

Facts: you need to get them straight. Rabies is an extremely slow-moving virus that is transmitted through saliva. This means that in order for a person to be infected, they ...

I am running; barefoot, through a tall treed, dark and forbidding forest . The tree ’ s are branchless and seem to be dead spears plunging themselves into the dark, ...

Unlike Unicorn, I knew what was happening to Thea pretty early on without having read the spoiler, and it annoyed me how roundabout you were dealing with the issue. You ...

I could have sworn I reviewed this ages ago (as in, when it was on the front page right after you submitted it), but apparently not. So here I am ...

This was rather difficult to read, for several reasons. First off, your punctuation was inconsistent, especially regarding question marks. Most of your questions end in periods, which makes your reade

You had a great flow and rhythm going on, right up until the last two lines, but then you lost it. You have 9 and 7 syllables in the last ...

Okay. First things first. The formatting of your post is atrocious. Why is your author's notes in quotes? It draws unnecessary attention to it, aside from looking extremely ugly when ...

I must say, it's a nice change of pace to see something short from you for once. ;P have I ever told you how the men at the pool molested ...

I was born on the wettest, coldest, stormiest day of the last decade. The midwife; my aunt, predicted to my mother that this meant I would do great things. I ...