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Re: A Break from Routine
As I slide the gloves off my hands, the winter chill crawls between my fingers and into my veins. I suppose it doesn’t feel better than leaving them warm and ...
Jun 30, 2009 -
Re: You're It (Preface)
This was very well written. Short and sweet. Your writing is nearly flawless in terms of grammar, and your style does an excellent job to set the stage with a ...
Jun 30, 2009 -
Re: 1:00
Thank you very much for your critiques Hannah and June. As I read my story again, I realize that the verbosity could be significantly slimmed down. And June! I really ...
Jun 29, 2009 -
Re: 1:00
12:57. My eyes were more fixed to the time on my car’s clock than on the actual road. One might call that dangerous, but anyone in my predicament would understand. ...
Jun 28, 2009 -
Re: Waiting For the World to Fall
Again, Shina, another great piece. Before I go off serenading you with compliments on your writing just yet, I'm going to tackle grammar. Grammar Corrections Maybe if my existence were ...
Jun 27, 2009 -
Re: About Tears
I thank both of you for your critiques. I've always felt a little weak on writing dialogue, but you two really shed some light on where it could be improved. ...
Jun 27, 2009 -
Re: Anorexia Nervosa
A great piece of writing you have there. Let it be noted that it is grammatically sound. That is priceless within itself. I can comment on the substance of the ...
Jun 26, 2009 -
Re: Defining Strength [part 1]
Shina, is it? Well, that's what I'll be calling you now. Anyway, let's point out that I just eat up your writing like buttered toast. It's delightful, and I can't ...
Jun 26, 2009 -
Re: On the Subtle Differences Between Identity and Culture
Grammar Patrol You cannot keep a culture private, individual, or traditional without first betraying society’s most important needs (in terms of advancement and long-term survival ): ingenuity and d
Jun 25, 2009 -
Re: All Mine
This was an entertaining story. It illustrated an interesting constrast between species (vampire and human) and fleshed out the jealousy factor involved with it. There were a a good many ...
Jun 24, 2009 -
Re: Daddy Loves You
I enjoyed it. I thought it was well-written and delivered an interesting perspective from a parent who faces a challenging dichotomy. Before I highlight some of the things I really ...
Jun 24, 2009 -
Re: The Night I Set the Sky on Fire
This is brilliant. I have very little to say but good things. Firstly, I appreciated the simplicity and succinctness of your story. It flowed and transitioned very well, I never ...
Jun 24, 2009 -
Re: About Tears
Would it make a bit more sense to you if I told you that they were 3 separate vignettes? The dialogue is not necessarily related to the other two parts. ...
Jun 24, 2009 -
Re: Winter: part1
All her points were valid, so don't overreact so much. It's simply a criticism.
Jun 24, 2009 -
Re: About Tears
Tears are of an international language. They mean the same thing, whether they are streaming down the faces of Africa, pit-patting on the porches of America, or saturating the tissues ...
Jun 24, 2009
