JabberHut

Thank you everyone for the comments! I perfectly agree that the intro really was not the bset. That's usually not how I write, but I couldn't think of any way ...

Ooh, I like it! Sorry I haven't critiqued this yet, but here I am! I shall critique! Anyway... “Now come on this is important.” A comma after "on" “What is ...

I seriously have nothing to say except...This chapter was amazing! You really improved, it totally caught my attention. I'm all for it! I felt what the characters felt throughout the ...

This is the last and final chapter. It took lots of work and still may not be finished, but it's what I got at the moment, so enjoy. Please comment ...

Here's the fun part. I hope you enjoy! :D Chapter 10 The next morning, I heard footsteps sounding in the other room and voices ringing, talking about their leaving for ...

This chapter is not as exciting as it has been, but you'll get through it, I swear! It'll be worth it in the end! This just shows that my characters ...

I'm getting into this story, really! I like how you ended in that cliffhanger. I do that all the time, keeps people wanting more! lol. Cammie and I instinctively looked ...

lol, I'm glad this story is to your liking. I was a bit worried. I never written a western before. I took your advice and put the link in my ...

omg omg omg!!! your my new favorite author!!!! kidding, but i do love this piece. it certainly made my evening more enjoyable!

Chapter 7 I explained to Deputy Luke and Brie what happened last night. They both listened intently. Deputy Luke gasped and watched me fearfully as I recalled the events. Brie ...

Okay, for school I have to write a paper based on the book "Of Mice and Men" by John Steinbeck. The assignment: A literary critic once said, "All characters in ...

Thank you very much for the tips, I'll take them into consideration!

Here's some more. chapter 6. Chapter 6 The next day, we put my plan into action. Brie couldn’t help because of her wanted help at the saloon, so it was ...

Oh good, at least I know the story wasn't abandoned or anything. Thanks for catching the gramatical errors. :D I'm really bad at that...here's chapter 5. Chapter 5 I stayed ...

I'll just keep posting until the end. I think I got a good story going, but I would like some comments of encouragement. Here's chapter 4. Chapter 4 I was ...