Hippie

I'd like to see some more thoughts from Paul, and maybe know some of his backstory. Is he annoyed at having to go out into the cold to find this ...

The rhyming thing didn't work for me. It distracts from the story, and I found myself skimming a bit because the sentences and paragraphs weren't dynamic enough, so there was ...

You did a terrific job of capturing the emotion and innocence of the boy. Him talking to the plants was great for invoking this. The setting was also magnificently described, ...

It's not the style I usually critique, so I won't bother you with showing and not telling, because that doesn't really apply to fairy tales. Instead I'm going to focus ...

This piece was very good, even though it breaks a lot of the rules I don't like broken. The MC speaks directly to the audience. She tells us a lot, ...

One more thing. Characters make or break a comedy so make sure they have plenty of quirks.

Soon however, the team realise their new career is not all fun and games. Finding themselves between a rock and an asteroid field, they attempt to bring justice to lawbreakers ...

Ah, I remember a certain hunting scene of mine you critiqued last year. It sounds like you really know your stuff. There's an air of confidence to this piece which ...

Happy reviewing Sunday :D I'm afraid this piece has fallen into a major cliche pit, and also has some pacing and credibility issues. These will need to be worked out ...

You are the lucky recipient of my 100th review. On with it then. To his delight, he tore a piece of it's wing membrane off in his teeth. The bat ...

I see you're going for a suspenseful beggining. The premise is good, but it comes unstuck in a number of ways. Firstly, breaking the fourth wall. If you don't know, ...

Try the snowflake method. I'd guess you can't finish because the task is so huge and daunting. The snowflake method breaks down the entire process into stages, so you can ...

Third person is more versatile. For example, I wrote the draft for The Wrong Side in 3rd person. Whilst revising I decided I wanted to gloss over a long tedious ...

Aren't they like, a manifestation of who the writer wants to be or wants to have around them? And the plot a manifestation of their hidden troubles/wishes/dreams; what they want ...

I'm afraid I have to disagree with Nick. The previous chapters were fantastic, but I found this one seemed rushed and distant, and with some inconsistencies. “I-“ But, I soon ...