HaydenMacaw

I really like the lines on her face-they look like tiger stripes. I also like the shape of her nose. Great picture!

I love the alliteration in the first line! The second line is confusing though; consider your word choice. After that the rest is amazing. "over me, into me" is a ...

I look at you You look at her She looks at me You are my…friend She is my best friend You two are sharing headphones I am fixing my shoe—literally ...

Thanks for the advice! I edited it above. If you would like to look at it again that would be awesome.

Declin rattled the lock with desperate intensity. Kara just rolled her eyes. Everyone else muttered quietly to each other in a futile attempt to be productive. Sarrabell was pretty sure ...

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This poem definately has potential.I like the symmetry in the opening lines of each stanza. The fourth line needs some work. Also the word hunger doesnt seem to fit; I ...

I love the gorey, edgy feel. I particularly like how you don't limit the metaphore to the dialouge, but rather include it in the dialougue and the naration. The last ...

Stunning workmanship! I like your use of ambiguity and directional imagery. You flow is disrupted a little in the second stanza, though I love the mouse refrence. On a more ...

This poem is absolutly beautiful! This past years I've had some issues concerning my family that I've really been struggling with, and your poem really pinpointed how I feel somtimes. ...

Great Poem :) I'm not familliar with the Gilligan Island tune, though. I think its great that you heave a twist at the end. My one comment would be that ...

Amazing! The rhyme in the first three stanzas feels fource, but after that it is flawless. I love the epic quality.

Excellent Poem! I find goverment and other social/cultural issues to be an excellent topic for literary inspiration. My one critique would be that the rythmic repitious tone, and the use ...

Let the truth be heard With a voice so loud Let the sound resound And proud listeners be Shout the truth out Let the world see We are Americans We ...