Griffinkeeper

Coh stared at the small heap of rocks, an intensity in his eyes that was rarely seen. His shoulders were hunched; every muscle tight. This sentence is kind of a ...

Welcome to YWS Starlight! I'm Grif, one of the many friendly moderators here on YWS. You can see for yourself how friendly everyone is. That said, if you run into ...

I got to say, I half expected some sort of guerrilla/special forces mission in some jungle. I didn't expect the PenguinAttack . Though it was very funny, the battle scenes ...

In a house where air flowed not through any vent but through every opened window,thick and oppressive. This is a poor start. It sets the story up so that this ...

First, thanks for all the comments. I'm afraid I had to leave the work before I was completely finished. I'm in the process of adding more to the original post. ...

The arrival of visitors caused a commotion in the Isle of Thalen. It wasn't so much the fact that there were visitors, strangers arrived all the time from the surrounding ...

I've gone ahead and upped the rating to 18+. Mostly because it rattled me a bit and I'm well over that threshold.

My advice: experiment with it. If it doesn't work, you should be able to pick up on it pretty quick. If it does, then put it on YWS just to ...

“It is now four forty-five. If you are not in the dining hall at this time, you may not have breakfast. Servers will be out momentarily with your portions. You ...

Danger felt ambiguous, like the smell of bitter coffee, as the Tram ambled up the rough and broken pavement of future highway 1106. This sentence is nonsensical. Ambiguous means to ...

Length is the least of your problems. The narrator is crazy, which makes it difficult for the reader to relate to them. I mean, readers like reading books, they're biased ...

Welcome to YWS Diva! I think you will find our "Writing Tips" forum quite helpful, it's a great resource for the enthusiastic writer. We also have a Knowledge Base that ...

*Moved to General Fiction Novels* I think you'll find a faster answer to your question here, than you would in the writers corner.

Welcome to YWS! Take a look around the site and you'll find that we have lots of enthusiastic amateur writers here. So if you're writing is terrible, you're in good ...

Welcome to YWS! If you have any questions or run into any trouble, just let me know.