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Forevermore2195

  • Novel / Chapter » General, General Re: Establishing Image

    I LOVE IT!! Now I have a very good idea what the school should be like. But, I don't know. Maybe mine would have just a little more freedom. I ...

    Oct 6, 2011
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Happy Memories

    Hey, Your writing is good. A little crude at times, but that only shocked me because it started off so different. I don't have a problem with it. The voice ...

    Oct 5, 2011
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, General Re: Prologue to a story i'm calling sub-zero

    Hey, I have to say, it sounds like it could be an interesting story. There are some grammar mistakes though, even though I know it is only a prologue. Only ...

    Oct 5, 2011
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Barely 18

    Hello, I'm not really into poems and whatnot, but I thought "Why not?" when I saw the heading. I did enjoy reading it too, so I'm glad I took the ...

    Oct 5, 2011
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Listen

    First off... I like it :) I'm not really into poetry but I think you just changed my mind. For this piece anyway. You don't give too much away, which ...

    Oct 5, 2011
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Walls

    Hello, I felt that the poem didn't really... flow? It felt a bit forced. Or something along those lines. The part that really caught my attention and when my interest ...

    Oct 5, 2011
  • Short Story » General, General Re: The Killing of the King

    Hello, I wouldn't exactly say that I liked it, but mainly thats just the content. It doesn't appeal to my preferences but I'm sure others would love it. You show ...

    Oct 5, 2011
  • Short Story » Fantasy, General Re: Lone wolf

    Hello, Your writing is fairly good. But the dialog part of it, does indeed sound very childish. Not very sophisticated and doesn't really fit in with the story. Maybe you ...

    Oct 5, 2011
  • Short Story » Romantic, General Re: Mindless fluff.

    Hey, For someone with dyslexia, you did pretty well in my opinion. Sure, maybe some touch ups here and there could make it really really good. But as you said, ...

    Oct 5, 2011
  • Short Story » General, General Re: The beginning of the end

    Hello, You really do give definition to the phrase "short but sweet". I liked it, the way it portrayed her emotions, it is really evident. Maybe there could have been ...

    Oct 5, 2011
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Forbidden

    Hello, To tell the truth, I didn't really understand that concept of the story until I read other peoples comments. But now that I have I sort of get the ...

    Oct 5, 2011
  • Short Story » General, General Re: Folded Up

    Hello, For the most part, I really did enjoy your writing. It was hard to understand at first, I had no clue what it was about but after a couple ...

    Oct 5, 2011


A person is more than their experiences, stacked up like stones... Our best moments are the foundations we use to reach for the sky.
— Yumi and the Nightmare Painter by Brandon Sanderson